I like structure in my life. I like to timetable my days based around multiple projects with multiple deadlines. I organise, I prioritise, I like writing lists and I love ticking boxes. If there is a problem I like finding a solution. And yes, I am a control freak.

Well life couldn't feel more out of control than it does right now. Teaching schedule in the bin. Trips, events and appointments cancelled. Running out of pasta. Isolating to keep my husband safe. No football. Constant level of anxiety. Haven't had a good night sleep in weeks. And a sadness that creeps up on me in the quiet moments.

Sound familiar? I wallowed in self pity for a while but got bored. I've watched more TV, tried to relax and read a book, lost myself in a jigsaw for a bit, spent more time cooking (and eating) etc. But I am just not very good at 'taking time off'. I need to be busy. I need to find some boxes to tick.

Of course I could clean the oven. Thankfully things haven't got that desperate yet. Luckily I have my studio at the end of the garden, serious amounts of fabric, dyes etc and now I have lots of time to work on stuff. But what type of stuff? Before this awful crisis hit I was totally fired up about my new series of quilts. I was longing to free up some days to finish the second piece in the series and to start printing fabric for the subsequent two pieces. But now the work, expressing my concern about the changing nature of our democracy seems rather irrelevant. Even my usually steely determination cannot get me past this unexpected and unwanted creative block.

But I have to be doing something. So I have done one thing that I  had been wanting to do for a while. I have, at long last, added thermofax screens, dyes, textile inks etc to my webshop. Ticked a big box there! And I have started to do something that I had told myself I wouldn't do. I have started printing fabric to sell. Not that there is anything wrong with that but when I decided to pay my bills by teaching and making art I made myself a promise that I would focus on those two things and on writing books. And that I would only sell the fabrics that I generated as part of teaching and demonstrating.

But times change. I have temporarily lost my artistic mojo; lost my main source of income (teaching) and my brain is too distracted (yet) to work on my next book. So printing fabric and making up packs to sell is ticking boxes. It is keeping me busy, giving me some income, giving my life structure and helping me cope.

It is also quietly satisfying. There are no big light bulb creative breakthroughs that I might get if I was working on my art but I find joy in the process. And we all need some joy right now.

However you are doing it I hope that you have all found ways to make this strange and frightening world more bearable. Stay well, Leah